Monday, March 14, 2011

When I grow up, I wanna have...

GROUPIES! No, what about... a road map to my goals? Is that too much to ask for?

"I can feel the Pressure, it's getting closer now..." - Paramore's Pressure


As the sands fall from the hourglass on my 25th year of life, I have been feeling some pressure to "figure things out". What I mean by that is my career, relationship, identity - basically where I'm going/plan to be in life. Even that sentence is overwhelming. For the record, I do not handle stress well at all. Although I relish the idea of following my instincts towards a life where I enjoy each new day, I'm apprehensive to embark on that journey without a solid plan for each challenge.

Maybe I'm overreacting a little? I could be overanalyzing, or trying way too hard to control the uncontrollable. This is most likely true, and to tell you the truth, this is completely out of character for me. I usually make decisions on impulse, wait until the last minute of a deadline, and buy something I don't need because it's packaged nicely. (Good marketing should always be rewarded.) However, I have always been told that in order to be successful, at anything, you need to be organized. I'm getting a bit off topic, I digress.


I believe that where we are today is a direct result of a path that we chose to take. For example, my dad had worked in the coal mines for years alongside his father. My dad chose the path to begin working right out of high school mainly because he disliked school. He was on this path for a while, and worked hard enough to become the boss underground. My father continued on this path for a while, until he came to a point where a new path had appeared. My father could decide to continue on the path he was on, following the footsteps of his father, or go down this unbeaten path that no one in his family had taken before. Eventually my dad chose to go down the new path that leads him towards a Bachelors degree in special education.

Now I am not naive enough to think that everyone will come across a shiny new path like my dad. Some are forced to stay on their current path for job security, or they choose to stay on that path because they like where it is heading.

I have thought about the paths that I have come across. I have already chosen the different paths a few times. I changed my major, altered my graduation date, and then after graduation, moved to a larger city to live on my own (against the wishes of my parents). There were both positive and negative effects to my decisions. When it comes down to it, the decisions I have made have lead me to where I am today, take it or leave it. Ha!

So, here I am. Where? Well if this was a mall directory, the star that says "You are HERE" would be at the intersection of one path meeting three new ones. I believe that the path I'm on is about to end and I need to choose which to take. None of these paths are going to be easy, and I'm pretty sure they're all uphill. I have never been a big fan of extreme exercise, but I'm still excited for what's ahead.

To Be Continued…







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